Sometimes in life...well, a lot of times in life, we get so busy that we tend to forget or neglect the things that were given to us as great and wonderful blessings. Jobs, finances, worry, TV, stress, and many more all contribute to one thing - they suck away our time...time suckers. haha. As any married couple, you deal with the dry times of finances. Money seems to be one of the biggest struggles in our marriage. We don't want to go and blow away tons of money on clothes and entertainment, but it is hard when you know that you are restricted.
My husband works so hard...everyday. I don't think he has ever had a "day off" in his life. Sometimes he has a hard time seeing results of his hard work. I try to remind him - the roof over our heads, the food in our fridge, our electricity, and not to mention our most expensive thing of all...our son, James. Just because we can't eat out every night or see movies once a week does not make us poor or lack anything...i don't think.
When we are limited by money, it leaves a lot of room open for creativity. For example, this past weekend, Ryan took me and James to Big Bone Park to go hiking/walking. We drove all around on that beautiful morning and saw some beautiful scenery out in the Kentucky country. When we got home we had a nice lunch full of sandwiches and fruit. After that, we decided to clean out the garage. I know that does not sound like much fun, but it was something that desperately needed to be done...plus afterwards we were proud of ourselves with all the extra space that we made in there. That night after dinner, we pulled out our corn hole set (that Ryan made a while back) and played. James watched while us rednecks played. Once James was tucked in for the night, Ryan taught me some guitar, which turned into a mini worship session for Jesus. It was a great day! And not one of those things cost us money.
For all of you married women out there, try to be open with your husband and how you are feeling. I have found that they are not mind readers...at least my husband is not. There have been times where i have felt lost in the shuffle between Ryan, James, and Ryan's work. As wives we are to encourage and be our husband's cheerleaders....but we also need that same encouragement to take care of our kids and to keep the home in order. So be honest with one another. I was honest with my husband, and he graciously listened. My whole thing is - when you are married and have kids, romance seems to be on the back burner...the burner over at your neighbors house. that is how much we tend to forget/neglect it. Try to keep the romance alive! And if you are like us and do not have tons of money to spend on spectacular dates, be creative. We cook together with music playing. The other night, while i was cleaning up the dishes after dinner, we had Norah Jones playing in the background. My husband came and slow danced with me in the kitchen. It is moments like that that are more special and more romantic than a dinner and a movie.
So, be encouraging, be honest, be romantic, be creative. Don't forget all of the blessings that God has blessed you with. And don't waste your time worrying.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Sunday, September 26, 2010
ONE YEAR AGO
Our baby boy is now considered a Toddler. He turned a year old on September 15Th. The night before the big day, i could not sleep a wink. I tossed and turned throughout the night thinking about our baby James growing up. I was suddenly taken aback to our old apartment, restless as well. The morning of September 15, 2009, i woke up early to take a nice warm shower, finished packing, and Ryan and i hopped into the car to head to the hospital.
We arrived there around 7:30am. It seemed as though once we stepped through those glass doors, everything became a blur. I was being induced, because our little boy was getting too comfortable in the womb - plus my younger brother was being deployed to Iraq the following day. I wanted James to meet his Uncle before he left. I got into my very "stylish" hospital gown as the nurses prepared me to be induced. As they checked me out, i was already 2 cm dilated and having contractions - i did not know it. The first part of the induction was some kind of bulb syringe thingy that they placed up in me. This was probably the most painful thing i had ever experienced. With no drugs, no numbing medicine, they placed this small balloon that was hanging onto a hanger that looked untwined type of thing. I was nervous to say the least when i saw this contraption. Once that was in, i had to wait until i was 4cm in order for this balloon thing to fall out. Eventually it did. (i do not recommend for anyone to try that) Then on came the Pitoson. That medicine sure brought the contractions on really fast. I would try to walk around, bounce on an exercise ball, and have my husband rub my feet to relieve some pain.
At one point i was laying down, wondering when my water would break...then i felt a small gush of water come out. "mom, i think i just peed on the bed." My water had broken.
I waited until i was 7cm dilated to have the epidural. Honestly, i was more worried about having the epidural than having a baby. Everyone had to leave the room except for two nurses. They raised my bed up and i sat over the side draped over one of the nurses shoulders. She was so sweet and talked me through it. The epidural nurse put the epidural in my back so quickly that it only felt like a tiny sting. just a minute later i felt the relief that the wonderful drug could give.
Beside my hospital bed was this machine that kept watch of James' heart rate. it was loud - his heart beat. That was the one thing i would listen to the whole time i was there. Any little flutter i would ask, "is he okay?" By the time 8pm rolled around, i was comfortable but getting tired. Biggest Loser premiere started that night, so that was the one thing i watched. My doctor was also a big fan of the show. She came in and checked me out and saw that i was already 10cm and his head was crowning. I had no idea. The epidural literally gave me no feeling down below. The doctor and i both decided to wait until Biggest Loser was over to start pushing. By the time 10pm rolled around, James was ready to come out.
In our low lit room, it was me, Dr. Oak, Ryan, my mom, and two nurses. Dr. Oak sat on the end of the bed as Ryan held one of my legs and a nurse held the other one. We talked as i pushed. Every time i felt a contraction i would take a deep breath for 10 seconds then let out a big push. Dr. Oak wanted Ryan to do the counting. "1....2........3.........4." "You have to count faster!" i said as i was holding my breath. The whole delivery part was so calm and peaceful, nothing like the movies make it. At 11:15pm, James came out and into our world with a loud cry. He was so beautiful...and slimy. They placed him on my chest for just a few seconds, then the nurses whisked him away to be cleaned and warmed up. I tried to keep my eyes on him, but i couldn't see him from where i was laying. I started to feel really weird. I was bleeding very heavily. My Dr. was trying to act calm, but i could tell from the look in her eyes that something bad had happened. The nurse brought over a lot of gauze to stuff in me to stop the bleeding. Then the "shakes" started to happen. I could not control my body - started to shake uncontrollably. I was freezing cold, so the nurse brought over towels and put them around my upper body. I wanted to hold my baby, but i couldn't. Family started coming in to see our new little blessing as i was being stitched up. Ryan scooted everyone out seeing that the Dr. needed to keep stitching. My mom watched James as Ryan came and sat beside me. I started to cry. The epidural was wearing off and i could feel every stitch that she was putting in me. Thankfully, the epidural nurse came back to give me another dosage to make me comfortable. Our doctor started to stitch me up around 11:20 until 6:15 the next morning. The bleeding finally stopped then. i was relieved and very tired. I did not get to hold James until that next day. Once i did, i never wanted to let him go. He was so precious...looked exactly like his dad. I could not believe that i was now a mommy. That day, i felt like my life started all over again.
We arrived there around 7:30am. It seemed as though once we stepped through those glass doors, everything became a blur. I was being induced, because our little boy was getting too comfortable in the womb - plus my younger brother was being deployed to Iraq the following day. I wanted James to meet his Uncle before he left. I got into my very "stylish" hospital gown as the nurses prepared me to be induced. As they checked me out, i was already 2 cm dilated and having contractions - i did not know it. The first part of the induction was some kind of bulb syringe thingy that they placed up in me. This was probably the most painful thing i had ever experienced. With no drugs, no numbing medicine, they placed this small balloon that was hanging onto a hanger that looked untwined type of thing. I was nervous to say the least when i saw this contraption. Once that was in, i had to wait until i was 4cm in order for this balloon thing to fall out. Eventually it did. (i do not recommend for anyone to try that) Then on came the Pitoson. That medicine sure brought the contractions on really fast. I would try to walk around, bounce on an exercise ball, and have my husband rub my feet to relieve some pain.
At one point i was laying down, wondering when my water would break...then i felt a small gush of water come out. "mom, i think i just peed on the bed." My water had broken.
I waited until i was 7cm dilated to have the epidural. Honestly, i was more worried about having the epidural than having a baby. Everyone had to leave the room except for two nurses. They raised my bed up and i sat over the side draped over one of the nurses shoulders. She was so sweet and talked me through it. The epidural nurse put the epidural in my back so quickly that it only felt like a tiny sting. just a minute later i felt the relief that the wonderful drug could give.
Beside my hospital bed was this machine that kept watch of James' heart rate. it was loud - his heart beat. That was the one thing i would listen to the whole time i was there. Any little flutter i would ask, "is he okay?" By the time 8pm rolled around, i was comfortable but getting tired. Biggest Loser premiere started that night, so that was the one thing i watched. My doctor was also a big fan of the show. She came in and checked me out and saw that i was already 10cm and his head was crowning. I had no idea. The epidural literally gave me no feeling down below. The doctor and i both decided to wait until Biggest Loser was over to start pushing. By the time 10pm rolled around, James was ready to come out.
In our low lit room, it was me, Dr. Oak, Ryan, my mom, and two nurses. Dr. Oak sat on the end of the bed as Ryan held one of my legs and a nurse held the other one. We talked as i pushed. Every time i felt a contraction i would take a deep breath for 10 seconds then let out a big push. Dr. Oak wanted Ryan to do the counting. "1....2........3.........4." "You have to count faster!" i said as i was holding my breath. The whole delivery part was so calm and peaceful, nothing like the movies make it. At 11:15pm, James came out and into our world with a loud cry. He was so beautiful...and slimy. They placed him on my chest for just a few seconds, then the nurses whisked him away to be cleaned and warmed up. I tried to keep my eyes on him, but i couldn't see him from where i was laying. I started to feel really weird. I was bleeding very heavily. My Dr. was trying to act calm, but i could tell from the look in her eyes that something bad had happened. The nurse brought over a lot of gauze to stuff in me to stop the bleeding. Then the "shakes" started to happen. I could not control my body - started to shake uncontrollably. I was freezing cold, so the nurse brought over towels and put them around my upper body. I wanted to hold my baby, but i couldn't. Family started coming in to see our new little blessing as i was being stitched up. Ryan scooted everyone out seeing that the Dr. needed to keep stitching. My mom watched James as Ryan came and sat beside me. I started to cry. The epidural was wearing off and i could feel every stitch that she was putting in me. Thankfully, the epidural nurse came back to give me another dosage to make me comfortable. Our doctor started to stitch me up around 11:20 until 6:15 the next morning. The bleeding finally stopped then. i was relieved and very tired. I did not get to hold James until that next day. Once i did, i never wanted to let him go. He was so precious...looked exactly like his dad. I could not believe that i was now a mommy. That day, i felt like my life started all over again.
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