Everyday Happenings Of A Wife And Mother

Monday, February 24, 2014

Am I Willing To Submit?


Now, i am no pro in the marriage category by any stretch of the imagination.  I am still, after 6 1/2 years of marriage, a wife in the making.  So this question does intimidate me....a lot.
I don't want to walk on my tip toes around my husband and make him think that i have it all together all the time...that is not realistic. We are indeed human.  Despite our sinful natures, God has still called us to be great wives for our husbands. 
God really loves to bring the topic of marriage up quite a bit in the Bible.  Not only that, but our "duties" as a wife and husband.

Colossians 3:18

Instructions for Christian Households

18 "Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord."

Ephesians 5:22

22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord.

Ephesians 5:24

24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

1 Peter 3

Wives

In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives.
Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They trusted God and accepted the authority of their husbands. For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do.


 Yes, you are probably thinking after reading those verses, 'this seems very one sided.'  I am a wife, so i am focusing on the WIFE.  There are many things that the husband is called to do.......

I wonder if there is a reason why God addresses the wives 1st in each of these verses?  He addresses the husbands after the wives.  Does this mean that we are better?  No.  I, however, believe that the husbands will have an extremely hard time submitting to the Lord and their calling if we, as wives, do not.  
A husband is called to be the head of the home.  The leader.  The earthly provider.  I have asked multiple times, "This seems unfair to the wife...we are just to simply submit?" Yes. Among other things. 
A lot of women have a hard time with submission.  I have.  We tend to think that when we submit to our husbands that we are giving up our rights, our voice, and our opinions.  So it is a challenge!

The reason why i am posting about this topic, is because this has been going on in our home.  My husband and i have never had any real fights or really been in serious situations that really required me to "submit."  I am a very indecisive girl, so i love that i am married to a man that knows what he wants. haha!  We have always been in agreement, really about everything....until we had kids.
We were both raised very differently, and came out all right. haha.  So we are bringing into our family two totally different ways about raising our children.  Both are not wrong.  Both will bring good to our kids....they are just different.  
Even though we are both seeking the Lord and what is best for them, we have been left not in agreement.  I don't know what your home is like when you are not in unity with your spouse, but ours is tense.  I think the devil loves to take something so simple as a disagreement and turn it into bitterness and ultimately use it to pull you apart.  
 
While i was seeking God in the matter of our boys and schooling, i was praying that God would soften my husband's heart.  Little did i know that my heart was the one that needed softening. 
 
For some reasons those scriptures up above kept jumping out at me and convicting me.  My opinion was not wrong.  My way of parenting was not wrong.  I was seeking the Lord for unity in our marriage, but He had a different way of making that happen.  I needed to submit.
By me holding onto my will, i was not allowing my husband to step into his role as head of our home.  
 
IT IS HARD FOR A HUSBAND TO LEAD WHEN THE WIFE IS NOT WILLING TO FOLLOW.
In my own way, i was emasculating my husband.  It would be a totally different story if he was not seeking the Lord or the best for our family.  He was and is.  I found it hard to not submit to that.  
 
There is peace in our home once again. :)  It is a daily challenge for me to submit to God's will for me as a wife....but it is worth it.
 I challenge you, sweet wives, to really step into your calling as wives.  This will help pave the way for your husband to really reach his full potential as a man, as a husband, and as a father. 
Praying for unity and peace and lots of love in our homes!