Thankful Thursday...in Pictures and Words

 I'm so thankful for these two faces that i get to see everyday! I went into motherhood thinking that i would be teaching my children so much, but i really feel like i have learned so much from them.  They have shown me just how selfish i am with my time, energy. 
I have had a wake up call about spending time on the Internet with them around.  The Internet has become a means of an escape or even a connection to the "outside" world that is beyond our house walls.  While i was "connected," i have been losing connection with my boys.  I found myself getting irritated from them following every step i would take.  For them barging in on "my" time.  Yelling and deep sighs were all my boys had been getting from me all week. Almost every night i would lie my head down in guilt over how i acted that day.
Yet, despite my yelling and easily angered attitude....they still desired to be around me.  They have so much grace and love.  James would ask me to "snuggle" with him.  Adam would bring his favorite book over and motion to sit on my lap.  It just hit me....how loved am i. 
Most (i) look for outside approval or recognition to feel good about themselves.  The fact that my kids have and will see me at my worst....and still have so much love for me....is just completely mind boggling. 
I am thankful for my kid's love.  I am also so thankful for God's mercy....and that it is new every morning!










I am so  so so so thankful for 7 Hills Church Motherhood Group.  Every time i leave so refreshed and desiring to get into the Word and focus on who God created me to be.  Every single mommy in there are so awesome, accepting, and encouraging. 
Last night we had an awesome speaker come and give her testimony and encouragement.  I wish i would have recorded everything she said.
But the thing that stood out to me was - "it is not your circumstances that matter, but your reaction."  Our reaction to our obstacles/circumstances are what really matter more than the obstacles/circumstances themselves.  There were so many awesome things she said.  She talked on perfectionism as a mom....lose it!  I have found that i am a perfectionist....i am learning to let that go especially with my kids.  I thought if i messed up or failed than that meant i am a horrible mom...no it just means i am human and that there is room for God to come in and do His mighty work through me.



I am thankful for house projects that don't cost much money...and that i get to do them with my hubby.

Our Stairs Before

AND AFTER (We also painted the gold walls on the stairs yay!

And our Dresser turned entertainment stand. The one we had before we had bought at Big Lots right after James was born.  Well, when i was pregnant with Adam i would do my workouts using it - triceps dips and just to sit down.  Well, sadly i will admit, it bowed in the middle where i would sit and exercise on it. haha! Hence, why we decided to do this.

BEFORE

AFTER

I am continually thankful for having my family here from NC.

Sam

 Abbi

 Such a special family.

And lastly, i am thankful for sweet little surprises from my husband....and date nights!

Smiling and Rejoicing

I had to post these pictures because this rarely happens.  1) the boys falling asleep at the same time in the same place and 2) i always make them sleep in their own beds....i need my time.
This is day 3 of being stranded inside from the freezing cold temp.  James has been off school all week, which i did not mind - i don't like going out in the cold. :)  So....you can imagine the cabin fever felt within our home.
All week i've been trying to busy myself and the boys to not go completely insane.  Cleaning, laundry, obstacle courses for the boys, TV....you name it.  In the midst of putting off the vibe that i was a superb mother and housewife, my attitude reflected stress.  I'll be honest, i cannot even count the number of times that i yelled at my poor boys.  I found myself losing it and hanging onto every minute that drew me closer to nap time.
We did manage to get out the house for a bit last night to the library.  We walked in like we were such a loving and united family, while not even an hour before was spent with a yelling 1 year old throwing food on the ground and trying to force feed a 4 year old his dinner all while trying to have an adult conversation with my husband. haha! 
So there we were, making our way into the library, greeting the librarians with very sweet smiles and nice conversation.  Then it hit me.  Wow....i was a nicer person to a random stranger than i was to my own kids. 
For some reason i feel like we (I), go out of our way to be nice to others outside of our home more than we do to those who we love more than the whole world........who we prayed for.  Who God blessed us with. 
This morning i woke up feeling very tired and not so well - i've had some issues going on physically the past month.  Instead of getting up an hour before the boys do, i drug myself out of bed about 15 minutes before they woke up. In my head i was thinking "great, this is going to be a great day." (Sarcastically) 
I had enough time to read a little devotional (thanks to my hubby who got the boy's breakfast ready for me before he left for work). 
The title of the Devotion was - "Rejoice Today." The devotion went on to say how important it is to start your day rejoicing and to be thankful to the Lord in the morning. 

Psalm 118:24

New Living Translation (NLT)

²⁴ This is the day the Lord has made.
    We will rejoice and be glad in it.

Instead of worrying, stressing, and wishing the day away......i want to be a woman who "rejoices" for each new day.  Even if it is spent being cooped up in my home with my wild boys.

Before i went up to get my boys, maybe it was fatigue, but i really felt the Holy Spirit saying to take it easy and enjoy my boys today.  To not busy myself and even them......to just simply be with them today.  

My boys are still napping right now as i am typing......the day seemed so much better than the others - not a lot got done, but i was not filled with stress or constantly yelling.  

The story behind the top pictures - before putting the boys to bed, i let them crawl into ours for books.  They always think it's a real treat to get in mommy and daddy's bed.......because it is usually off limits! haha!  With kids, the bedroom at night may be our only place and time for Ryan and i to be alone together.  

The boys fell asleep while i read books.......and that usually never happens.  

I think my boys knew i needed that.......it was very therapeutic for me.  To hold 2 of the people that i love the most........and just be still.  

While everyone is creating and attempting their new year resolutions, i have been thinking about what i would like to do.  There are so many things!  There are so many things that i am fasting and praying for this year.

Right now, i know that i want to be nicer.......smile more to those within my home and REJOICE everyday. 

James' Preschool Christmas Performance

Yes, i am that mother who cries at every milestone that her kids have.  I cried when both my boys first smiled.  I cried when they crawled, walked, talked, and when they had massive blow up pooh that somehow managed to always get everywhere except the diaper. haha. (there has to be some sort of emotion in a household full of boys, right?)  I cried when i took James to his first day of Preschool.  While i do LOVE having just 1 child to be responsible for...for a couple of hours, it still breaks my heart that i am not with him. 
james' Preschool put together a Christmas program for the families to come watch.  james' class sang a few songs.  When i saw him walk out on that stage...tears yet again welled up in my eyes.  Though it is so so so so hard teaching, loving, leading, guiding my babies sometimes......it is such a privelege to be able to watch them grow. 
James was such a cutie.....and a stinker - he pretended to yawn in between songs. haha!  He usually does that so he won't smile.  Once he saw us in the audience....he practically sang to us.  It was so sweet.

The classes did great.  I am really thankful for all the wonderful ladies that work in that Preschool!

We also had Adam with us.  He used to be my sit as still as a rock snuggler boy.  Since he figured out that his chubby legs could take him places.......he prefers to be on the go......ALL THE TIME.  He lasted for James' class, but was ready to go for the others.  We took him into the hallway to run it off, but he decided to dance instead.

I am so thankful for moments like that day......where i was able to sit back and really see our boys growing. 
I'll post about our Christmas soon!