Ryan and i have been having a heck of a time with parenting lately. This season in our life has been busy and a little chaotic - with Ryan in school and working. Along with the busyness, throw in a 3 year old and a teething 5 month old into the mix and you get 2 overly exhausted parents.
James has been growing so much lately. His vocabulary surprises me everyday. But it seems that when they grasp new words and learn new things at 3 years old...an attitude comes along with it. haha! It is crazy how a little one, whom you love so much, can really...tip the ice burg. I just want to go back to when he was in his so called "terrible two's" and say to myself..."this is nothing compared to what's ahead." haha. I am finding that 3 year olds are much more difficult. At least mine is anyway.
Like i said, Adam has been teething, the poor thing. Which has resulted in him waking up late at night. (our son's have their dad's persistence) :) Crying it out for Adam is...crying all night until parent's are too tired that they will give in. haha! What makes the situation harder is that the boys share a room. So of course, James wakes up, but luckily he doesn't get out of bed...he will just lay there. But his lack of sleep shows up in the day time - by little fits here and there.
Lack of sleep and dealing with a stubborn 3 year old...can take a toll on you. Your nighttime sleep and even your physical demeanor seem to yield to the situations of children.
Right now, both of my boys are napping. PTL! I can think back on the day thus far. My attitude has been overrun by my emotions of sleepless nights and a trying 3 year old.
Even though our kids, spouses, or other people get under our skin, we cannot blame them for how we respond.
Some of us are masters (myself included) at blaming others for "making" us feel a certain way. We tell our kids they made us mad. We tell our husband he made us feel unloved. We tell people they made us feel embarrassed or insignificant. We end up telling that our feelings are other people's fault.
...and that is not the case nor true.
No one else is responsible for our feelings. No one else makes us feel a certain way. Our kiddos did not irritate us. James tried my patience by not listening to me...and i chose to become irritated about it. Our husbands did not upset us. They did not do what we wanted and we responded by becoming upset.
You may be wondering, "What else am i supposed to feel in a certain situation?" (Like when your child disobeys you for the hundredth time.
Answer: ANYTHING YOU WANT
You see, you are the one who has the power to determine your feelings. Not your kids, not your spouse, not your friends. Nobody else but you.
Oh but your children, especially, will try to push those buttons....but how you respond is key. We have a choice of how we are going to respond. It is so hard! Believe me! There have been so many days where i have taken on a negative attitude because of what others have done. But i don't want to rot in bitterness. That is no life. It would be so much easier to blame others for how we feel. The only thing we can blame others for is for their words and their actions. I have to blame me for my response.
If you allow yourself to give into negativity and bitterness in your heart...you will become a negative and bitter person. I don't want to be like that for my family. (even though they are the driving force of it sometimes haha!!) I am learning that how i respond to certain situations, especially if they involve my kids, will show them how they should respond.
As i have said before, your kids are your biggest fans, admirers, and "watchers." They watch and mimic almost everything you do. haha, which can be scary.
So, don't blame others for how you feel. Take control of your emotions and lean on the Lord to not give bitterness an easy access into your life. :) Respond with how you want to Live.
Have a happy and bitter free day!